ONE SWEET DAY JUZ ROUND D CORNER

I HAVE MY OWN REASON TO BECOME OVER JOYED..1ST AND FOR MOST, HUBBY BOUGHT ME BLACKBERRY JAVELIN INSTEAD OF HTC SNAP..TENGS..HE ALREADY PREPARED ME FOR ANOTHER HP+SIM CARD WHEN I'LL ARRIVE MALAYSIA NEXT WEEK..SO ITS AN ADVANTAGE FOR ME NOT TO REMOVED MY MOBILY..BUT TILL NOW HE SEEMS STRUGGLING TO OPERATE THE BB ESP HOW TO GET CONNECTED TO WIFI..AS WE ALREADY ASSUME THAT BB COMPANY WILL TRY TO CHARGE THE USER TO PAY EVERY SINGLE THING THAT THEY ARE PROVIDE THROUGH THAT HP..WELL INSYAALLAH, IT WILL BE A SOLUTION COZ HUBBY REALLY GOOD IN GADGET BETTER THAN ME..HEHHE..

2ND THING I PASSED MY ACLS EXAM..ITS REALLY DIFICCULT AND I NEVER BUDGET THAT IM GOING TO PASS AS THE STATION ALGORITM ALMOST SHUT DOWN MY BRAIN AND MAKE ME CRIES..TENGS GOD..SO I NO NEED TO PAY SR350 IF I FAILED..AND OF COURSE NOTHING TO GET WORRIED AND RUINS MY VACATION..YEAH..MY HOLIDAY JUZ AROUND D CORNER..I'LL BE HOME AFTER 9 MONTHS BEEN IN RIYADH..I'LL HUG AND GIVE HUNDRED OF KISSES TO MY BIRU..AND SPEND THE TIME DRIVING MY CAR THAT I NEVER DRIVE FOR A LONG TIME..AND FOR SURE SPENDING MY TIME WIF MY FAMILY N HUBBY..A LOT OF STUFF TO SETTLE..I'LL BE HOME SOON..YEAHHHH

God!! I'm guilty...

arghh..seems i end up my day with a really damn hell situation..i didnt notice that i still had a patient..and she or he probably i didnt know is still on the table..with a bloody hell infiltrated..
how i didnt check each rooms before im leaving as i should do as my routine before..mayb im too tired or rushing home.. and the worst part is my head nurse calling me through hp and my colleague is stucked with that patient who's suppost to be mine..oh God..how guilty am i..what did im thinking in my bloody hell brain..mayb cause of no TECH is calling from the other rooms instead of HD,and i saw the cleaner was moping SIEMENS,thats make me taught that rooms is not working..and i doesnt know that rooms will give me hard time..
arghh..how can i facing with them tomorrow, and show my stupid and careless face..i dont know what are they thinking bout me at this moment, but this stupid mistake really give me a big impact on my profession and work ethics..how careless am i..and mayb im putting myself too much thinking bout my wedding preparations untill i did this bull shit mistake..oh god..can i switch off my wedding wires inside my brain and get focus back into my jobs?.can i??please,for a God sake,do it for ur own good and shut it out the rest bloody non important things for a while(im motivated myself..dunt bother)

GOD,IM TIRED!

2day, im damn tired.cerebral embolization took about 6 hours to complete the procedure.and that mama will have a very expensive brain.mana taknye,coiling untuk aneurysm je da dekat SR50K,stenting 3,each SR18K..hehehe..n aku da nak pitam pakai lead gown dalam tu..balik penat2, aku terus masak n on9 ngan hubby b4 mandi, iron baju n makan.

esok OT lagi, lusa hari cuti tapi aku OT lagi..memang penat gile..OT aku memang mahal..sejam je da SR60.71,so 6 jam setiap kali OT da SR360++ sebulan OT 8 kali dapat la dekat 3k..takde la penat sangat OT, tapi if keja penat pagi tu,memang nak jalan balik pun x bole da..

now aku worried pasal cuti aku.aku da mintak comptime rabu, n tiket pon da beli..if head nurse aku x approve mati la..yang aku bengang aku da apply since jun,tapi new staffs banyak yang dapat balik awal..bengang gile..da la nanti aku keje kat angio,camne die nak release aku..aku tunggu die balik dari Egypt,aku nak tanya..aku x kira..dah la nak cuti lama2 kne reject,tiket plak da beli..pening aku..baik aku tdo,ni pon da fenin2..penat gile..

MIGRAIN

2day aku offer myself working in Room 1,suppost Room 3..tapi aku nak blaja handle major cases.Sementara Dr Shammari xde bole la blaja..nanti org tua tu da balik dr vacation,gabra la..perit telinga asik dengar die jerit 'shit,shit,shit' during procedure..and kitorang ni habis kelam kabut bile die jerit..'ya la, bring..bring..bring the patient'..pening dengar..

so,td my radiologist order sedation fof patient,n the patient still in pain.so, die cakap la 'more fen'..aku ni ye2 je dengar die nak morphine..heran gak aku nape nak morphine..aku pon amik la fentanyl je..aku cakap kat die 'sorry Dr,mafi morphine,but i just standby u fentanyl,in case u need it'..Dr tu ape lagi panadang la aku smcm..rupenye die cakap 'more fentanyl'..ceh, naseb aku x amik morphine..cakap tu biar habis..abbreviation x betol langsung..

sudahnye,pastu aku migrain..macam nk pecah otak aku..penat gile..1 kes je da took about 2-3 hours..ngn GA cases lagi..transfer ke ICU plak tu..keje kat interventional angio radiology ni memang penat..nak kne pakai lead gown lagi..asik expose kat radiation je..mn x migrain aku..

balik uma,try on9 ngan sayang..hotel sayang ade wifi, tapi line hampeh..skjp ade, skjp xdok..lagi la tambah stress n migrain aku..tp sempat la cakap jap..hilang la rindu aku..sayang pon asik outstation je skang..hopefully time aku balik nnt, die ade la ms nak spend ngn aku..da la jupe 6 bulan skali je, mn x rindu gile..hmm, aku nak tido la..malas nak makan..xlarat..nnt aku update lg blog if ade cite best..

NEW MOBILE

Slalu wedding present di buat hantaran..tapi aku n Sayang da beli siap2..hehehe..same gok..Sayang cakap senang if ade hp yg bole wifi..If die outstation die still bole on9 ngn aku..Aku plak bukan tau sangat pon..Sayang ajak beli aku beli je la..Aku pon x kesah sangat..janji bahagia..kitorang memang minat Blackberry Javelin, tapi sayang cakap leceh..program die seme kne bayar..nanti caj je dah lebeh mahal dr hp..so, we decide nak beli Samsung SGHi780 untuk hubby n aku HTC Snap..

SHOW ' EM WHAT YOUR FLAVA

Bosan betul hari ni..Nak kuar malas, panas sangat kat cni..da nak sapei peak die..Sayang plak da kne p JB, jadi judge untuk karaoke Aizat..Aku pun ape lagi, asik pk2 nak beli keta ape nanti..Everyday taste aku tukar2..Keta yang da ade aku nak up grade lagi kasi 200hp..Sayang pon da janji nak teman aku cari tayar parada,e-manage, turbo timer, boost meter n kasi tomei sikit keta aku..lama dah x drive..takut aku gabra je nanti..Aku n Sayang memang minat gile kat keta.Aku da ade turbo, Sayang ade NA.Sayang planning nak beli satria standard.Aku plak??Kat bawah ni adelah antara keta yang aku akan beli salah 1..lantak la ade 4 keta..duit aku, peduli ape..hehehe

HONDA ACURA NSX-RM160K-200K (tp kete ni rare..ssh nk cari kat msia)

HONDA S2000-RM130K-160K

NISSAN SILVIA S15-RM80K-RM120K



NISSAN FAIRLADY-RM130K-150K



tu la antara keta yang ade dalam list aku..keta orang tua ade gak aku pk,cam 5 series, merc clk200..aku berangan lebey je ke?nampak kete seme mahal2 kan?mampu ke aku?gaji aku skang 14k,x mampu lagi ke rasanye? tapi 2nd hand je la..hehehe

TANPA

2day xtau nak watpe..Nak study malas. .ACLS exam bulan 9..Nanti la baru study..Tu yang sapei 3 blog aku tulis..Ni lagu TANPA..Aku minat lagu ni sangat2 n aku bagi kat Sayang..Aku tau sayang x heran pon coz artis die..nak muntah dah die dengar,tapi aku nak bagi gok..Aku sayang sangat kat die ni.. xtau la ape aku nak buat dalam hidup aku ni tanpa die..tanpa die aku xkan ade sejauh ni..mencari pengalaman n rezeki kat tempat orang..tanpa die aku xkan merasa bergaji sebesar ni, membeli ape je yang aku inginkan yang 1 masa dl hanya bole berangan je..tanpa sayang,mungkin masa ni aku da x jadi orang da..heheh..hanya die je yang bole bersama aku dr masa ssh aku hingga masa aku dah senang skang..n x salah aku berkongsi kesenangan aku bersama orang yang aku cinta..


Resah yang ku
Ubah dalam kata
Melukiskan kesunyian
Tanpa engkau aku tak mengerti

Meski
Pagi itu menatapi
Akan sunyi tanpamu
Menemani aku sepi

Tanpa..
Cintamu aku resah
Tanpa..
Kasihmu aku hampa
Tanpa..
Dirimu aku mati
hohoo…

Kini benar-benarku rasakan
Dalam benuk hatiku tanpamu
Ku tak mengerti
Takut
Takut jauh dari dirimu
Kan kau tinggalkan aku sendiri
Tanpamu ku mati
Hohoo…

Resah yang ku
Ubah dalam kata
Melukiskan kesunyian
Tanpa engkau aku tak mengerti

DO I NEED WEDDING PLANNER?

Aku skang banyak benda nak pk..Exam je da every month, letih aku..Nak pk nak bridal shop lagi. Entah la, aku ni fussy sket. Xnak la baju yang cam zaman purba dulu kala..Aku berkenan ngan E-Qaseh kat Tangkak tu. Baju pon cantek2.Nyah tu make up pon ade style. Orang yang muke penuh herawat pon jadi cantek, ni kan aku..Huhuhu, ngalahkan artis la..Tapi kne tengok time la, ade ke masa aku nk p sana..Cuti pon da la sekejap je.. Kursus kawen lagi nak kne p..Sayang cakap nak g kat Bangsar,harap2 ade la kosong..Time balik ni je la aku kne buat seme benda.. Katering, baju la..Next balik insyaallah nak kawen da..Sempat ke aku nak buat seme ni?

Baju yang aku suke dari E-Qaseh

JAKARTA AND BALI TRIPS

Actually dah 2 months our trips ni..Aku yang takde masa nak update my blog. Bz OT sampai penat nak buat ape2.Hehe..Me and Sayang spend our 2 weeks on this vacation.Ye la, penat bekerja n dah lama x jumpa, so we decide nak g bali. Kami spend 2 days kat kota Jakarta.Xde ape xtvt menarik sangat kat sana melainkan shopping, shopping n shopping lagi..Sayang la berminat sangat tengok perfume n kasut. Aku malas nak beli pape sangat. Pic pun x banyak yang kami amik.Asik berjalan je.. Aku yang teringin nak naik tut2 pun x dapat.Takut tengok tut2 pon da cam moto racing.Next 2 days, pepagi bute lagi dah p airport nak ke Bali lak. Ni la pic masa kami sapei kat airport Ngurah Rai yang cuteee sangat, kecik gile..Hahaha..

Bali memang best.Hotel pon kira ok la,tu pon da puas bising kat reception yang nak bagi bilik cam kat Jln Chow Kit,heheh..Kira naseb la da dapat bilik best pastu..Kitorang everyday p jalan kaki ke pantai kuta n matahari Mall..Borong habes-habesan sapei x menang tangan..But 1 things if ure here..Jangan ler percaya sangat nak beli barang2 cam silver n jam tangan yang rega 200 lebey, coz seme tu kencing je kuat.Sayang pon da terkena, naseb la dapat tukar jam, coz aku da terbuang resit..Sorry hby..huhuu..Makan kat cni pulak kena jaga2..Kang termakan daging kuda, kucing, xpon anjing..Hahaha..Tapi kami makan kat tempat2 yang best je la..Coz x brani carik pasal makan tempat biasa..Budget makan x yah cakap la..Mau lebeh dari 60 skali makan..Hubby nak gak layan aku bawak p M BAR GO, R&B disko..nak layan muzik je..Tengs.. And hajat nak naik kude pon dapat,even aku hangen je ngan mamat kude tu..Ade ke patut jalan2 naik kude sapei 100 lebey..Tapi bab shopping memang bestttt sangat, murah gile..Ikut ati nak je aku shopping sapei penuh flight.

2 weeks kat cni rasa sekejap je..Aku plak da kne fly balik KSA, sayang plak balik Malaysia.Aku rasa next time kami akan mai cni lagi, tapi shopping sakan plak kat Ubud.For me, Bali is really nice island. Aku rasa worth it kami spend money dekat cni, even nearly 10K for only 2 weeks..crazy rite?hahaha..

I Do Misz A Thing

Today is a fifth month since I left Malaysia. I know nothing gonna change a lot with or without me. But I really misz peoples that i left behind me.Am i very ambitious till i able to grab this opportunity which may only comes once in my life?
No! I have my own reasons to do this. Im not willing to left my lovely family, my beloved bf, my car n my cat. They're really meant to me. But I have to sacrifice, to pay back the mess things that Ive done before. I need to pick up every single pieces of my life and put it back on my precious pride till i become somebody.
Here life without my love seems a bit difficult. I misz him every single breath that I take. Not even second Im not thinking bout him. Because of him, Im here. And im carrying his trust and hope to still standing here and hold my confidence. He's my saviour, my advisor and my everything to me which no one can defeats him.I'll try to change all my unwanted attitudes and turn it into a brand new person.
For my family, Im trying to do best to prove that I can be independent and swept away a ridiculous and a bullshit nonsense thing that ruins their trustness on me. Oh God, I do really misz them. And of course poor my little Biru. He seems to spend all of his life stucking in the cage. Thats a thing that I cant forgive myself.
I realllllllly misz all of u.......................






p/s: for my 2nd husband(my car), juz wait till I get back home, were going to rock u in..